Love is the only section on Shared Sunday’s that I fear. I thought I might take a stab at “Love”, though I’ll probably tangent off into every other section.
It is extremely difficult to add original content to the topic of love and very easy to borrow ideas from the thousands of articles already written about it…. I’ll try my best to avoid temptation…. But I won’t avoid trampling all over regular writing conventions.
I have learned from my humble experience that Love is an ambiguous term that is never quite defined the same way, by friends, sisters or even pets. There are as many interpretations of its meaning as there are links when you punch the word into Google.
With that in mind I’m going to focus this article on the “classic” notion of love between two people (three optional).
The wonderful thing about my love life is that it happened so naturally. I didn’t have to hunt for it, I didn’t have to try hard at it, and I’m not keeping a tight grip on it for fear that it might slip away. I’ve been a relationship for 6 years now and this is my take.
I’m fortuitous in that my girlfriend is my girl friend. Our interests tend to coincide, we are very energetic and on the move. Our tastes of course tend to differ, preference of movie, musical inclinations, and even physical activities.
The root of all the success I have found in love is indeed… honesty. (If this is the first time you have read this you might be beyond help) There is nothing that I wouldn’t tell my girlfriend, there is nothing that I would prefer she not hear (well…. some things, but it’s still for the best that she knows all!). When I ask her for advice, I prefer she has all the information before she gives me any. When she gives me advice it is not expected that I follow it, but neither is it expected that I ignore it.
I think sporadic fights (yelling, possible tears, and avoidance) are healthy, so long as it doesn’t last more than a day.
I believe there is a lot to be said about the expression “easy going.” The more often you focus on the little things, the blurrier the big picture gets. We all have our personal desires and the best parts of life stem from their fulfillment. I treasure the moments when she can share in my own personal joys (and I hers).
We make times to do things together; we make time to do things apart.
I don’t understand couples who thrive off chaos. I have come to know that drama is the enemy of any solid relationship (even if the makeup sex is good). I don’t believe that you should ever play a mind game with someone your serious with; to do so only makes them play back (even if they don’t want to) or even worse…embitters them.
There should be no need to fish for attention, it should be given generously. I’m honest about my feelings even when they tend to be selfish….sometimes I need to be told they are selfish.
I never shut up. I have unloaded more nonsensical philosophical, fantastical mumbo jumbo in various states of intoxication and sobriety than most people ever will… and yet she listens.
Compromises are reasonable and if we ever get into a rut (as I believe all relationships do) we talk through it with patience, making subtle changes when we can.
Above all we are not in a rush, when you’re in love you know it will last. There is no friction when it comes to picking a movie; there is no feeling that you’re doing too much or little… unless you are.
Finally, I there is always some extra bit of joy to be found every time we’re together.